My rug has a taste for flesh!

 

Look at it. Look at my rug.

It lures you in with its inviting softness underfoot and its bright cheerful colours, looking so unassuming and .......rug like.

You wouldn't imagine that such a striped beauty was a heartless savage with a taste for human flesh.

Oh, how many times my clan have fallen prey to its brutality. Just minding our own business, sauntering past, and then.....KABAM!

 

 

It latches on with razor teeth and talons and trips you up, leaving you quivering, bruised, sore and yes, even bleeding.

And that's just the physical wounds we all bear. We also carry with us psychological scars of shame, embarrassment and fear that may never ever leave us. And there are no support groups for our situation. Oh no. I've looked.

 

 

So now we warily edge past the rug, holding our breath and preparing ourselves for the moment it pounces. But then sometimes it doesn't attack.It just plays with our minds and breaks down our fragile mental state even further.

If it wasn't so freakin' pretty and didn't lift the room with all of its technicolour glory I'd be willing to ship it back to the wilds of Africa and let it roam free once more, confident in the knowledge that it would harm no more of my clan again.

But I cant send it away.

I just cant do it.

So we throw the rug a chunk of raw meat every now and again to appease its wicked appetite and we pray and we hope to live one day in harmony with our rug.

Is there anyone else out there that lives in fear of normally ordinary household decor items?

Please tell me the we are not the only ones!

 



Sweltering in skirts.

 

There has been a crazy stretch of hot weather in Melbourne lately.

Oh I know how that sounds. Bitch. Moan. Boo hoo. So much lovely hot weather and blue skies.
 How terrible!

And to rub it in even further we are having all this ridiculously hot weather during a long weekend so we have an extra day to swelter and melt. Poor us. What a hard life.

It has been over 30 degrees for, it seems, like an eternity and my summer wardrobe is feeling old and tired. Done. Dresses are on repeat. It is all "been there, done that."

My fall back outfit for the very hot days is a singlet top and vintage skirt combination so the new to me skirts I scored in the Mornington op shops recently have been very welcome and have quickly been put into rotation.

Remember these guys.

 

The green skirt is a heavy linen type fabric (very precise aren't I) which I paired with a black and white striped singlet.

The weight of the fabric means it is great on those hot blustery days because it doesn't expose my knickers to the world.

My only issue with it is the length because I feel a bit matronly in it, so a little trip into the sewing room for a shortening is in order.

 

 

Possibly the best thing about this outfit is the fact that I'd moped a bit because I didn't have a green necklace to match, and you know how matchy-matchy I like to be. I'd stopped in at the tip shop (sorry, recycling resource centre) and then a quick look see at an oppy, and lo and behold a gorgeous green necklace in exactly the right shade was there to greet me.

For $2.99!

Just another example of the op shop gods smiling upon me!

 

 

 

 

The green necklace wasn't the only great score for that day.

Look at these amazing records. Am I the only person to buy records because of the covers?

 

This one has some great songs on it and I adore the groovy cover.

 

This one I bought simply because the cover  is hysterical. What a family. Can you imagine them all rocking out with their piano accordions at Xmas and poor old Bev (I'm calling her Bev because she looks like a Bev) the black sheep of the family being told to sit in the corner at the piano because she couldn't handle the cracking pace of the jam.

 

My other Mornington skirt is this flirty, floral, swirly number. This one is a full circle skirt with a western vibe. I teamed it with high wedges, a simple black singlet top and purple accessories.

 

 

 

 

 

The skirt is so light and airy in the heat, but is devastating for my modesty, as it was constantly blowing up around my ears and showing off my "old lady" spanx type undies.

Sexy image, huh?

 

Now I'm off to hunker down underneath the cooling vents and watch a Tim Burton marathon.

 I even think a  vodka may be necessary. What am I saying?

A vodka is always necessary!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Going to the chapel....

I'm off to a wedding in April.

Let me just tell you that I adore weddings. Couples I don't even know getting married send me searching for a hanky with a terrible case of the snivels.

Weddings are just so full of magic. Oh, the romance! The beauty! The jewels! The frocks!

A girl can truly be a princess (or a diva -yeah, I've seen Bridezilla's) on her wedding day and her wildest dreams can become  reality.

You want to say "I do" in a hot air balloon a gazillion feet in the air? Sure can!

You want to exchange vows underwater in a shark tank? But of course!

You want to enter into matrimonial bliss whilst dressed as Shrek and Fiona as you both drive ride on lawn mowers pulling trailers full of midgets in Elvis costumes? Easy peasy!

I had so many crazy ( I really mean awesome) ideas for my wedding to make it unique.
I'd has this grand plan of walking through a cavalcade of fire breathing circus performers, but alas, some dreams must remain just that. (Damn mothers and their common sense about wedding dresses and fancy hair do's being highly flammable.)

Any hoo, I'm attempting to plan my ensemble for the upcoming nuptials in April and there are sooo many divine dresses parading themselves on Etsy but my bastard bank balance has put a stop to the idea of a new frock.

Let me dream just a moment.

 

Don't buy this dress from here because I want it soooo bad and if someone etsy buys it I may have to kill them for it. You have been warned!

 

This frock from here is so sweet it is making my teeth hurt.

 

So, it appears that a reworking of a dress  I already have may be in order, and you know, what? Sometimes that is more fun anyway. Giving a well loved favourite a breath of fresh air with different accessories and a fun twist can be just as great as adorning yourself in a stunning new beauty.

Yeahhhhh. I'm not really convincing myself either.

 

Thinking of weddings prompted me to dig out this amazing ladies magazine, "Woman", from March 1953. It features a wedding special.

 

 

I have had this since I was about 15. Back then I was sporting a full goth look and attitude and sneered at the frothy white wedding concoctions, but now my look and sensibilities have changed drastically and I now adore the stunning frocks featured.

 

 

 

 

 

The illustrations and fashions are just swooningly (yep, that's now a word) beautiful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And the ads are fantastic. I'd have bought one of everything they are trying to sell just because the ads are so great.

 

 

I think that the agony aunt section, 'Ask Dorothy Dix" would have to be my favourite though.

Dorothy doesn't beat around the bush and has a tough love, hard hitting Judge Judy type attitude.

You can see one of Dorothys' responses above "Spoilt daughter" in which she admonishes the writer, "You sound like a thoroughly foolish, headstrong girl, too much indulged by parents and friends"

Whew, don't hold back Dorothy!

 

I'm so glad I didn't rip up the magazine and plaster the pictures on my school folder as I had planned.

It is such a treasure!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dangerous delights

Image found here

I've had some terrible experiences in the kitchen lately.

No, I'm not talking about face flambe or a spider in my sandwich. It's worse.

All the recipes I have been trying lately have bloody well worked!

What are the odds huh?

It is really unfair that I really enjoy cooking and I really enjoy eating because when I cook something amazing I have to eat it. Not just eat it, but EAT IT! Lots of it. Lots and lots and lots. You get the picture.

It's like I am my own enabler with the chef part of me whispering seductively as I hold out a plate of cake, "C'mon babe, look at this delicious cake I baked just for you. Mmmmmm, how good does that smell? Just a taste babe, you know you wanna."

And then the other part of me, the food  addict, takes one little look at all that baked goodness and says, "It would be so rude of me not to eat the cake because you have gone to so much trouble. Just a little taste." Then I gobble the entire thing up in a frenzy of crumbs and guilt and shame.

So I have been baking up a storm, trying some new recipes and unfortunately, (for my arse and hips and thighs) they have all succeeded.

Here's a peak at some of the dangerous delights I have been whipping up of late.

 

 

 

I made this one up myself. I threw together come boiled red quinoa, baby spinach leaves, roasted sweet potatoe, rocket, beetroot and feta. So delicious. So healthy. So unlike all the delights to come.

 

 

 

Gluten free almond and coconut cake with raspberries. This was a recipe I found here.

I'm playing around with a lot of gluten free recipes and foods at the moment because I'm finding that wheat and gluten are not my friends (I love you but I hate you bread!)

This cake was delicious, moist, crumbly and with such a great almond flavour.

I did cave in and use real butter because that's the kind of risk taking girl I am.

 

 

Look at those little dumplings of delight! Damn they were fantastic! These were another made it myself recipe with chicken mince, lots of grated veg and hoi sin sauce going into them. They would probably be quite healthy if I hadn't deep fried them.

 

 

 

I am salivating just looking at this bad boy. I found this recipe for Portuguese Custard Tarts in the Melbourne's Herald Sun ages ago and can't find it to link to. Despite the fact that the frozen pastry was old and weird they still turned out to be AMAZING. I would love to swim in a vat of this custard, it is that good.

 

I'm off for a walk now to try and take my mind off a really great recipe I just found for a chocolate, banana and peanut butter smoothie.

I can't make it. I just can't.

Because knowing my luck it would work, it would be delicious and I will never be able to stop making them.

 

Have you had any kitchen successes lately? Or disasters?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grey skies and a grey dress.

It has cooled down in Melbourne thankfully with the last couple of days bringing rain and grey skies. That's not normally a reason for rejoicing but a reprieve from the relentless heat and muggy, sticky sleepless nights is VERY welcome.

So to celebrate the cooler weather I donned a cardigan, my ruby red hair flowers and did what I do best; op shop!

 

 

 

 

 

I wore a great 60's homemade dress that I found in an op shop ages ago for a measly $4.99. The low price may have been due to a rather unfortunate odour issue.

 Phew did it pong !

A trip to the dry cleaners fixed the stink and now I can wear the frock and not fear that people think I may live in a dumpster.

The dress is grey and white striped on top and a lovely dove grey skirt and has a cute little bow at the neck.

I also op shopped my red cardigan with the greatest cable detail.

Actually I'm pretty sure I op shopped everything I had on today except my  unmentionables and hair flowers which I made myself.

And don't I look smug!

 

I hit Mornington today, which is a beautiful seaside area, but unfortunately it wasn't bursting with goodies . I did walk away with a couple of vintage skirts and another black cardigan. (I have lost count of how many little black cardigans I now own. I'm scared to count because there are probably enough to warrant their own wardrobe) and even a pair of roller skates for my little lady.

I was actually pretty shocked by some of the ridiculous prices in some of the charity shops today. $230 for an vintage fur stole and $700 for a guitar. C'mon people, you're not David Jones!

 

 

 

 

Can I just tell you how much  I've been missing all my Nana cardy's during summer.

There is nothing more comforting than a cuddly woollen cardigan.

I'm off to be a domestic goddess in the kitchen and am making a delicious quinoa, sweet potatoe, baby spinach and beetroot salad topped with feta.
I have made it before and it is freaking fabulous.

Before I go, let me share a snap of the little lady from the other day.
She was having some issues with her hair on the trampoline.

 

 

 Maybe I will have to try her technique to get volume on my flat hair days!

 

Betty Lou

 

I introduced you all to the divine Miss Angelique, and now I have the pleasure of showing off my other Eye Spy treasure, the adorable Betty Lou.

Now Betty Lou isn't one of those high falutin fancy girls like Angelique, no, she's more at home sitting on a porch swing with a glass of home-made lemonade. But isn't she pretty!

She has the loveliest pink and green floral print on a black background, the cutest pockets and pink crochet trim. And let me tell you that she fits like a dream with such a flattering cut.

 

 

 

 

 

You know that all a girls needs to accessorise a frock is a luxuriant moustache!

 

I think the dress is made from a feed sack type cotton and looks to me like its from the late 40's/early 50's. There is no label and is obviously homemade so I have already concocted  a detailed (and romantic) back story about who made the dress and all that the wearer experienced whilst in the dress. Does anyone else do this or is it just me? Its pretty fun let me tell you. There is one frock I have that has a story that involves a love affair between circus performers. And I'm pretty sure I'm spot on with my imagined histories.

I have worn Betty Lou only twice, so I think whist our summer is favouring us with such glorious weather I need to take Betty Lou out for a stroll in the sun.

Hang on Betty Lou - we are going to go make some more memories!

Feeling a little beige

I'm having one of those days today.

You know - everything sucks, nothing goes right, I am sick of everything including myself.

I'm suffering from an advanced case of the bleeuugghhhs.

It's not exactly like the blues, or even like Holly Golightly's mean reds.

It's more like I have the beige's, where everything has lost it's colour. No sparkle, no glitz; everything is bland and boring.

It could just be that I'm feeling ill today with a nasty tummy.

I've spent way too many hours over the last few days stagnating in the doctors waiting room, hunched over in agony, imagining that there is an alien incubating in my abdomen just waiting for the moment until it bursts forth in an explosion of entrails, pus and gore.

Yeah, so being sick makes me lose any sense of perspective that I may have previously had.

By the way, the doctors waiting room is how I imagine hell. Waiting forever with no good magazines or TV, uncomfortable chairs and surrounded by uncaring receptionists, snotty children, vomiting old folk and bleeding construction workers.

To renew my faith that life is not beige, I have been searching for the colour in my life so that I can drench myself in rainbow hues and lift my spirits with zesty shades.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There, I have banished the beige's for a little while, cheered by some happy, bright bits and bobs that live with me.

Reading awesome blogs helps to beat the ghastly blah feeling too.

God, the ladies from Misfits Vintage

 

 

and Helga Von Trollop

 

 

 crack me up and damn if those girls don't rock some excellent colour combo's.

What colours are cheering you up?